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Writer's pictureYaakov Lazar

Lessons from Bereishit: Unity, Connection, and Responsibility

Parshat Bereishit, the Torah’s account of creation, provides deep insights into human relationships, emotional well-being, and the balance between unity and individuality. God’s declaration that "it is not good for man to be alone" (Genesis 2:18) speaks to the core of human existence: the profound need for connection. This need for connection—whether between individuals, within families, or as part of a broader community—resonates strongly in today’s world, particularly when addressing the challenges faced by at-risk teens.

By exploring the lessons of Bereishit alongside Jewish wisdom from rabbinical sources, we can uncover practical and spiritual tools for fostering relationships, building resilience in parents, and strengthening community support for these vulnerable youth.


The Creation of Relationships—"It Is Not Good for Man to Be Alone"


The idea that humanity is incomplete without relationships lies at the heart of Bereishit. After creating Adam and surrounding him with the splendor of the natural world, God declared that something was still missing: human companionship. "It is not good for man to be alone" (Genesis 2:18) is the Torah’s first statement about the human need for connection. The creation of Eve from Adam’s side reflects the necessity of relationships that fulfill emotional, spiritual, and practical needs. This moment in the Torah teaches that relationships are essential for human thriving.


Just as Adam needed Eve to complete his sense of self, so too do teens, especially those facing emotional or psychological challenges, require meaningful relationships to feel whole. For teens who are struggling with trauma, depression, anxiety, or substance abuse, isolation can exacerbate their problems, deepening their sense of despair. The lesson from Bereishit teaches us that thriving is not a solitary endeavor. Rather, it depends on connection, understanding, and the presence of others who care.


Unity and Separation—Lessons from the Creation of Eve


The creation of Eve from Adam’s side represents more than just the origin of human companionship. It reflects a deep truth about the nature of relationships: unity does not mean the erasure of individuality. In fact, the Torah teaches that healthy relationships are built on a balance between connection and the maintenance of personal boundaries. Adam and Eve, while profoundly connected, were distinct individuals with their own roles and responsibilities. Their union was a model for relationships that honor both closeness and independence.


A healthy relationship with a struggling child requires emotional closeness—being there to offer unconditional love and support—while also respecting the teen’s need for autonomy as they navigate their challenges. The lesson of Bereishit teaches that relationships thrive when there is room for both connection and individual growth.

 

Kol Yisrael Arevim Zeh Bazeh


The Talmudic principle of kol Yisrael arevim zeh bazeh (Shevuot 39a), meaning "all of Israel are responsible for one another," reflects this fundamental teaching. Rabbi Moshe Feinstein explains that the role of the community is to ensure that no one, especially the vulnerable, faces life’s challenges alone. This principle calls for a broad sense of responsibility toward at-risk teens, highlighting the obligations of both parents and the community to provide support that fosters connections essential for emotional and psychological well-being.


The Lubavitcher Rebbe expands on this concept, teaching that each person carries a divine spark, and by connecting with others, especially those who are struggling, we help reveal the divine within them. For parents of at-risk teens, seeing the inherent worth in their child, even in the midst of challenges, becomes critical for offering the support needed for growth and healing.


Rabbi Shimon Russell and Rabbi Avraham Twerski: Wisdom for Parents


Rabbi Shimon Russell teaches that parents must love their children unconditionally but allow them to make mistakes and learn from their own experiences. This is especially relevant for at-risk teens, who may test boundaries and challenge authority. Parents must offer guidance without overwhelming their children with control, mirroring the creation of Eve, in which unity does not destroy individuality.


Rabbi Avraham Twerski, Z'TL further emphasizes that for parents to effectively support their children, they must also prioritize their own emotional well-being. In his teachings, Rabbi Twerski reminds parents that self-care is not selfish; it is necessary. Parents who neglect their emotional and physical health may find themselves unable to provide meaningful support to their children. The Torah’s commandment to "Guard your soul exceedingly" (Deuteronomy 4:9) reinforces this idea, urging parents to care for themselves as part of their divine service.


The Role of the Community—Mutual Responsibility and the Power of Connection


God’s declaration that "it is not good for man to be alone" extends beyond the individual or family unit; it speaks to the role of the community in ensuring that individuals do not face life’s challenges in isolation. The Torah teaches that human beings are inherently relational creatures, dependent not only on their families but also on their broader communities. For families of at-risk teens, the support of their community can make a profound difference in their ability to navigate the complexities of their child’s struggles.


The Jewish concept of arevut, or mutual responsibility, teaches that every individual is connected to the well-being of the entire community. Rav Kook, emphasized that the health of a community depends on the well-being of its members. This means that communities have an obligation to support at-risk teens and their families, providing them with the emotional, spiritual, and practical resources they need to thrive.


The Spiritual Dimension


The story of creation, in which order emerges from chaos, offers a powerful lesson for families of at-risk teens. It teaches that even in the darkest times, there is potential for renewal and growth. The Baal Shem Tov emphasized that every soul is sent into the world for a unique purpose, and even struggles are part of that divine mission. For at-risk teens, this message of hope is essential—they are not defined by their difficulties but are on a journey of growth, with the potential to overcome and transform their challenges.


Rabbi Nachman of Breslov famously taught that "the whole world is a very narrow bridge, and the important thing is not to be afraid." This resonates deeply for at-risk teens and their families, who often feel as though they are walking a precarious path. Rabbi Nachman’s teaching encourages both parents and teens to hold onto hope, even when the journey feels overwhelming. The creation story in Bereishit mirrors this idea: from darkness and chaos can come light, beauty, and new beginnings.


Conclusion:


The lessons of Bereishit and rabbinical wisdom provide essential guidance for supporting at-risk teens and their families. Strong family bonds, built through open communication and emotional support, create safe environments where teens can feel understood and navigate their challenges more effectively. Parents must balance unconditional love with allowing their teens the independence needed for personal growth, fostering both connection and individuality. Rabbi Avraham Twerski's emphasis on self-care reminds parents that maintaining their own emotional well-being is crucial to supporting their children. Communities also play a pivotal role by offering mentorship, safe spaces, and support groups to alleviate isolation and provide practical resources. By focusing on the potential for renewal and growth, both families and communities can instill hope and resilience in at-risk teens, guiding them toward healing. Integrating these Torah-based insights with practical applications ensures that at-risk youth do not face their challenges alone, but rather in a supportive environment that fosters connection, resilience, and hope for a brighter future.

 

Wishing you a wonderful Shabbos

Kol Haneshamot

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